Wednesday, August 09, 2006

The icing on the cake to a perfect day-projectile vomit

Yesterday was not the greatest day I’ve ever had. I stayed home sick on Monday with a doozy of a sinus infection so yesterday I went back to work doped up on antibiotics (I really needed them this time!), Sudafed and Excedrin.

It started out by me finding out that my behavioral-based interview for my supervisor training is scheduled for 7:30 next Wednesday. IN THE MORNING. I am not a morning person, so I’m going to drive down to Austin the night before and spend the night. My first night ever away from McKenna. I am SO not excited about this.

Then, it continued by me getting several nasty calls in a row from a few people at work, one of which was literally screaming her head off and using colorful expletives. I am not offended by expletives, but I refuse to listen to them from people that I am trying to help.

When I went to pick up McKenna, I got a semi-stern/semi-nice lecture from the teachers about doing too much for McKenna. And looking back on the past few weeks, I can see that they are right. I’m handing her toys rather than making her reach for them, which is probably part of why she might not be crawling yet. I’m still holding her bottle and spoon-feeding her and not encouraging her to hold her own bottle or try to feed herself. I’m not being as encouraging as I should be with trying to get her to eat finger food, and it’s because I’ve just been busy and I want our time together to be as pleasant as possible when we are…even though I know now that I’m not doing her any favors. Apparently she’s really pulling a drama queen routine at school when they are trying to get her to do those things. So I felt kind of depressed all night about being a loser mom.

Then, after P messed with her all night, got her to hold her bottle, managed to get her to feed herself with a spoon, thoroughly tired her out, I picked her up to give her a big hug before bed, and she promptly hit me with a stream of projectile vomit.

Great day. Just a great day. You can’t buy memories like these.


Blogger WhizGidget said...

I'm going to apologize now for laughing. You're right - you can't buy memories like a baby projectile vomiting on you. ;)

E - you're doing fine as a mom. You're not a loser mom. I know so few who would go all those extra lengths you did in making baby food for her all this time. And you're a doting mom, not a loser mom. But the daycare is right - she's got to learn to do for herself, and to tell you the truth, that's the hardest lesson that any parent has to learn. And it's the lesson that you have to remember as your children grow up. That they are going to take what they learn from you and are going to have to do for themselves, and learn for themselves... it's the path to independance, and it starts at a very young age (whether we want it to or not)

{{{{{{hug}}}}}} You're not a loser mom. And I'm sorry it was such a hard day at work. And you will survive your night away from McKenna... I know you will. And so will she.

9:21 AM  
Blogger Erin said...

You are not a loser mom, sweetie. I can tell you that Luke NEVER held his own bottle, and he turned out just fine. I just had the advantage of having no one to criticize me about it. It is hard to let them do it alone, especially when you watch them get frustrated, but to watch their face light up when they finally accomplish the task is also priceless! They are so precious when they beem with the pride of "look at what I did!" You also had a perfectly rotten day, for which you need lots and lots of {{{Hugs}}}. Hang in there!

9:46 AM  
Blogger Heidi said...

You are so not a loser mom! You just want to do what is best for you and your daughter....and honestly from being in the daycare profession for nine years or so now I will tell you honestly that I would rather see what you are doing rather than someone going in the opposite direction! You and she will be even more happy and love your time together once this transition time is over and she shows you what a big girl she is!

10:46 AM  
Blogger Shalini said...

She's only 9 months old, right? She'll learn crawling, or heck, she'll surprize you by walking straightaway. Like my friend's daughter did at 11 months! I think it's too early to get her to eat by herself! DS didn't start feeding by himself by spoon until a few months ago. She's doing just fine, don't worry.
As for handing her the toys, keep them within reach and let her try to do it herself. You have to use your own judgement on these matters. People will give you all kinds of "well meaning" advice but you know what's right! You are her mother.

11:09 AM  
Anonymous Melissa said...

You are a great mom! Not a loser mom! Of course they want her to learn to hold her bottle - because they have several babies to take care of and it's easier for them. But it's certainly not developmentally inappropriate for you to hold your bottle. At least you have a child who *will* take a bottle.

At the end of the day, the daycare has their opinions and you have yours. But you are the mom, not them. You are the ones hiring them. So don't let them make you feel bad!

12:15 PM  
Blogger KariA1 said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

7:57 PM  
Blogger KariA1 said...

I will echo what others say here. You are most definitely not a loser mom!! You are doing an amazing job!!

DD didn't start hand feeding until almost 10 months. She would gag on everything that was remotely solid, even cheese. I don't think she even got the hang of a spoon until ahe was a year old or more. She still even has problems at 2.5. DD also didn't crawl until 9 months and didn't walk until 14 months. She only learned how to jump a few months ago.

All in good time. McK is doing great! As my friend who works for Early Intervention always reminds me...."Childhood is a journey, not a race." Let her enjoy it! She will do things in her own time. Don't let the daycare workers pressure you into hurrying her up!

7:59 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I know I don't post here often, but I read your blog from time to time and I've always admired you.

You are not a loser in any way at all. You're wonderful!

Please ignore the remarks of the daycare people. I was a SAHM with a daycare license, and I watched no more than two babies at one time when my children were in grade school. When they were babies, I watched toddlers. All told I took care of (not at the same time) 11 children from infancy up to school age.

First of all, my children never held their bottles. My daycare babies didn't either. I held them, and that's how they took their bottles. My own kids quit using a bottle around a year, but I don't remember them ever holding it on their own.

Learning independence at nine months? That's a ridiculous notion to me. Quite frankly those words by the daycare people rather sickened me. I used to laugh myself silly inside when years ago people with three year olds said their kids 'needed" school for 'independence". Good gravy. They're three, I would think. And now you hear this about an infant? I'm floored.

Crawling? My son never crawled. He's now 20 and is a junior in mechanical engineering. He lives in the dorms, and is very independent. In fact, he always was independent from about age 4 and on, when he started preschool for two short mornings a week. Before that he was a crying, needy little one. That's what I would expect from a little one, and I didn't "make him" do much on his own besides what was developmentally needed. I respected who he was, and that worked out very well. The same thing for my daughter who is now almost 23 and is quite independent.

I didn't work outside the home until my kids were 10 and 13 respectively, and you know what? The fact that I was around to do a lot for them and with them was just fine.

I don't mean to upset you about your daycare people, but please don't put yourself down.

I am surprised they would tell you these things about how to care for your daughter. You're doing the right thing!

Susan in socal

8:38 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I forgot to say one more thing. When these daycare folks tell you how to raise your baby when she's with you, if I were you I'd just smile and nod. You know instinctively what your girl needs when she's with you. They're quite frankly just trying to make their jobs easier, without thinking of the child's developmental level. Just my take!

Susan in So cal

8:42 AM  

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