Thursday, April 28, 2005

One of life's mysteries

So tonight, Dubya gets on the tube and talks for an hour or so about the energy bill and some other stuff that I half-listened to from the confines of my office.

CBS, being the considerate network that they are, postponed Survivor AND CSI until Dubya was done.

Did NBC have the same courtesy? Heck no. So I missed a brand-new episode of ER...and considering how SELDOM those new episodes are, I was not happy. I don't have Tivo or any of those new contraptions, so I didn't record it for later watching.

Two things I will NEVER understand about NBC...why they don't take things like that into consideration, and why they insist on running a month of reruns to every one show during the season. I just don't get it. Oh, well. I'm sure CSI was much better than ER anyway, and I was very very sad to see Stephanie get booted off tonight. SHE is the true Survivor. Stephanie, you rock.

I don't have a whole lot to report. I have managed to be very good this week and eat in every night for dinner except one night, I have seriously kept the junk to a very threadbare minimum and ate healthy snacks like fruit, salads, sugar-free Jello, and I've even managed to drink a fair share of water. Weight is still staying the same...yay.

But MAN, am I starting to look pregnant. From the back, I look fine. From the front, fine. From the side, I have a belly. It feels like it sticks out more and more every day. P of course thinks I'm being silly and it's not that far out there, but he is agreeing that I have a very cute pregnant little belly.

One thing that did not go very well this week was work. I'm not getting along very well with my new supervisor. I'm going to try to keep this summary extremely clean. I've been reading Dooce lately (see blogroll) and it's this girl that actually was fired from her job a few years back for writing stuff in her blog about her work. (And by the way, her blog is HILARIOUS!) Granted, I don't think my company cares very much since I don't name it by name and don't get into specifics, but I don't want to tempt fate. For example, listing the name here that I've given this new guy probably wouldn't be a good idea. Ha! Anyway, to sum up, after about ten days of being extremely patient, I decided that I had had quite enough of having my judgement questioned, the very foundation of how I have done my job for the last two years shaken, and worst of all, my performance threatened because this guy is slow. My performance is judged very much on how quickly I pay claims, and when I can't pay claims because I'm waiting for days on end for this guy to review my files, it doesn't look good. I finally broke down on Wednesday, called him and told him how much it was bothering me, and how if he doesn't make me look good, I can't make him look good. He of course got extremely defensive, tried to blame others, got pissy (I had forgotten what working for a male boss was's been almost seven years), and then after we hung up, got his patooty in gear and started working my files.

The end clearly justified the means, but I hate having to resort to tactics like that. He made it pretty clear in our conversation that he thought I was overreacting and getting upset over nothing, which kind of bugged me considering that we are talking about MY JOB here. I know it's not the end all, but it is my career, I take it seriously, and he should too considering that how I perform affects his performance rating as well. I warned him before I started reporting to him that I am HIGH MAINTENANCE! I don't think he quite believed me until this week. He he he.

The other thing that he does that bugs me is that he is a phone person and not an emailer. Queenie was an emailer. We would go days sometimes without talking on the phone...all our communication would be electronically through our claims system or through email. This guy prefers to just pick up the phone and call me when he has something to say or ask. *sigh* It's going to take some getting used to. The day that I laid down the law with him, he called me about seven times to ask questions.

Anyway, that's all I'm going to say about how this week went. The rants and raves I had with my girlfriends at work were not even a glimmer of that clean. I'm still trying to hold out hopes that this is just a normal adjustment period and it will get better. Only time will tell.

On to a more happier subject. I get to spend the day tomorrow with P! Granted, we are going to a continuing education class in Arlington, so it IS work, but it's still a day I get to spend with him and get paid at the same time. How can that be a bad thing, right? The class is a day long and it is on fire damage restoration in the morning and residential structures in the afternoon. PERFECT for me. It is so rare that I ever find a continuing ed class that actually appeals to me. Most of them are about personal bodily injury and tort reform and stuff that just doesn't appeal to me, but this one is right up my alley! The only bad thing is that we have to leave the house tomorrow at 7:45 am. That's REALLY darn early. This of course means I'm going to have to hit the sack in probably about an hour or so so I don't wake up tomorrow feeling like I was hit by a train.

Saturday...going to a stitching retreat for the day. Sunday...working on the third bedroom. It doesn't officially become the nursery until we have it painted and the border up. Sharon's husband D and a friend came to pick up the weight set tonight so the room is now occupied by only my treadmill (which is staying in there), some loose free weights, and my dumbbell rack. And of course, the numerous piles of junk all over the floor. It's going to be a jobbie cleaning it out, that's for sure. That's my task for Sunday! Along with laundry, cleaning the house, vacuuming, sweeping...ugh, am I sure I'm ready to be a mom? I guess it's too late now!


Sunday, April 24, 2005

Do you eat crawfish?

P and I went to a crawfish boil last night that this attorney firm was putting on that services both of our employers, and it was a lot of fun. It's the second time we have gone, and I ate tons and tons of crawfish. They boil them and season them and then serve them with boiled potatoes and corn on the cob, and it's just an awesome, awesome treat. We had a blast.

But what was curious to me was overhearing all the conversations around me debating whether or not you eat crawfish. There were quite a few hoity-toity attorney's wives there who were just sitting there, smoking, and berating those of us who chose to eat those disgusting "insects" by pulling off the tail, peeling off the shell, and popping in the inside fish. I've heard them called mudbugs before, but I've never heard someone refer to them as insects. For goodness sakes, in my mind, they really aren't much different from shrimp...they just happen to reside in creeks and rivers rather than in oceans. What's the big deal?

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So my question to you today is, do you eat crawfish? If not, why not? Do you think it is disgusting?

Other than my outing last night out to eat lots of disgusting insects, I don't have much to report other than we have no food in the house. Not even milk for cereal. We are going out today to do major grocery shopping at Kroger's, and then when I get home, probably some laundry. I'm hoping that I can talk P into stopping at Home Depot as well. Sharon bought our weight set, and as soon as it is gone out of that room, we are going to clean it up really well, replace the baseboards, paint it, put up a wallpaper border (Finding Nemo!), put on new closet doors, and replace the blinds. I can't wait. It's going to be great! Then, we'll start working on the dresser and getting that ready. I need to have somewhere to put all of my baby stuff. Right now it's just still sitting in bags and boxes on the floor. This is the Finding Nemo wallpaper border that I found that I want. If I can't find it at Home Depot, then I'm going to order it online. And I think painting my walls Dory-bluey would be perfect.

I stitched a lot yesterday. For some reason, I couldn't fall asleep until around 3 am, so I worked diligently on Noah's Sub and then finished up my ten hours on Angel Procession. I figure I'd post a pic of Angel Procession since all you've been seeing for the last three weeks is Noah's Sub. Nice change of scenery! I honestly don't know if I'm going to finish by the end of June. If I had to guess right now, I'd say probably not. By the end of summer? Definitely. Thank goodness my new framer is super-fast! We'll just see how it goes.

Last week was my first week with my new boss. So far, it's going okay. Just okay. As much as I was ready for Queenie to hit the road, I really miss her now. Our new supervisor is...well, let's just say he's a tad overwhelmed right now, and I'm not the only member of my team who has noticed. I know he's trying his best right now, but I'm waiting days for approvals that Queenie would have had done in hours, and it's quite annoying. But I'm going to be patient and just let it go...and let him adjust. Not only is he new to supervising the fire team, he's also new to our company too, and I just need to cut him some slack. The other thing he's doing that's annoying is questioning my judgement on scopes. For example, if I feel like the attics are hard to manuever in, I usually agree to drop the ceiling drywalls to get the insulation out of the attic, and he was like, "Why are you doing that?" I was totally taken aback, because I had that discussion MANY TIMES with Queenie and she always made it crystal clear to me that it was my discretion, my judgement, and that if I felt it was necessary, it should be done. So this guy now coming in and asking why I felt it was necessary, and continuing to question it even after I explained my reasonings, just rubs me the wrong way. P continually reminds me that Queenie did the same thing when she came along, and I'm sure she did, but it's been SUCH a long time I don't remember how annoying it was!

Anyway, that's what's going on with me at the moment. This week will be fairly busy with work, lunch meetings, a couple of classes, and then next Saturday, I am going to a retreat outside of Fort Worth with my friend T to stitch all day, so that'll be fun.

As for right now, I'm off to post the Sunday Brunch and then scrounge for something (ANYTHING!?) to eat. Have a great rest of the weekend.

Wednesday, April 20, 2005

Making the person who called you fat feel about an inch tall? Priceless!

First of all, thank you, everyone, for all the positive comments that you wrote in my blog and emailed to me. I haven't really had a chance yet to respond to the private emails I got because I was working late last night, but I really really appreciate it, more than you know. It is SUCH a relief to know that I'm not bonkers for thinking that my doctor is off her gourd.

I pretty much spent Monday night being pretty down in the dumps and not really eating much...which is par for the course when I am feeling fat and chunky. I went to bed sad.

But I woke up MAD. This was before I even read any of your comments. I couldn't believe I had empowered that woman to make me feel so bad.

So the first thing I did after reading all the comments and all my emails was to call my old doctor's office and ask them what they thought. I could tell the nurse was extremely reluctant to say anything since they haven't treated me in over a year and a half, but she finally did admit that if no circumstances had changed regarding my physical health and I hadn't gained my weight back and what I had told her regarding what had happened with the miscarriage was true, then my doctor's comment that I shouldn't gain any more weight was just plain ridiculous.

The next thing I did was to call the cow's office and leave a message for her to call me IMMEDIATELY or risk losing me as a patient. Then, I called another doctor's office in the same hospital and made an appointment. When I told them what my doctor had said and why I wanted to see another doctor, the nurse just chuckled and said she had never heard anything so silly and of course they would take me on as a new patient. The new lady is 34, only a few years older than me, and the nurse put me on hold so she could ask her right then and there when she wanted to see me. That, I like. Availability is good.

Around 4:15 pm on Monday, my cow doctor called back and left me a message. I was very surprised to hear from her considering that the receptionists at the front desk told me that Tuesday was her surgery day and that she wouldn't be able to talk with me until the next day (today), but I called her back and got her right on the phone.

I wish that I could regurgitate the details word for word, but unfortunately I don't have much of a memory for details when I am a) in tears and b) driving down the road at 65 miles per hour. But what I DO remember was really reading her the riot act and telling her how incredibly BAD she made me feel on Monday by insinuating that I was grossly overweight, didn't know how to eat properly, and adding the additional stress of telling me that I should not gain any more weight through my pregnancy. I told her that unless I was mistaken, I was growing another human being inside me and that I would like her to tell me precisely just how I am supposed to keep my weight at this number I am at now, grow a baby, a placenta and amniotic fluid, all without dieting, and that I wanted to know if she had ever had a patient that had done that successfully. I told her that I felt it was incredibly unfair of her to assume that I was treating this pregnancy as a license to eat a pint of Ben and Jerry's every day and sit on my ass watching television, instead of being happy that I did what a lot of women don't do before they get pregnant and took care of business by getting my weight down to a respectable level. I explained to her that my pre-weight loss weight was 228, which is still over 40 lbs less than what I was at, when I got pregnant the second time, that I could not help being sad and unmotivated after my miscarriage, and that I did not, no matter what she said, think that gaining five pounds in my first ten weeks of pregnancy was the end of the world, and that I couldn't believe that she would pass judgement on me when she did not know me before, didn't realize how far I had come with my weight loss journey, and worst of all, that she had NO idea what she did on Monday for my psyche considering that I had just reconciled the idea of gaining weight in my mind with getting pregnant. I also told her that I had enough to worry about already with another miscarriage and work and didn't need to also add the additional worry of being lectured by her about gaining any weight at every appointment. And one of the last things I threw at her was that it was one of the worst moments of my life being called fat by my DOCTOR after I had struggled for almost two years to get to a healthy weight before trying to conceive, and that by doing that, she completely ruined my experience of hearing my child's heartbeat for the first time.

Clearly, I said a lot.

Her response was not what I expected at all. She was extremely contrite and very apologetic. She must have apologized about fifteen times in the thirty minutes that we were on the phone. She immediately said how she never meant to imply that I shouldn't gain any weight at all and that her intention was good and that all she wanted to impress upon me was the importance of regular exercise and a good diet. That was all. Of course, I immediately demanded to know why she said that I shouldn't gain another pound if that wasn't what she meant, and when she dodged it again, I reiterated word for word what she said to me on Monday. She felt very bad, I could tell. She apologized profusely for her cavalier attitude about it and said that clearly she didn't realize what a sensitive issue it was for me, but that she just really wanted to see me have a healthy pregnancy and deliver a healthy baby, especially after she watched me have the miscarriage and how much being pregnant means to me. She said that she felt really really bad that we had gotten off on the wrong foot on Monday and asked me to please reconsider giving her another try as she really cared about me and wanted to continue treating me, although she realized that I would have to do what I felt comfortable with. She also said that she had no intention of ever bringing up the weight again unless she felt like my health or the health of the baby was in danger, and that she was sorry that she had made me feel stupid, like I didn't know how to eat properly. She said other things too that I can't recall exactly, but clearly she felt very small and like a total heel.

She said a lot. A lot that I didn't expect. Usually when I threaten to take my business as a customer elsewhere, the people I threaten are like, "Go ahead, beeyotch! See if I give a rat's patooty!"

So, that's kind of where we stand at this point. I haven't made up my mind either way yet. As much as she hurt me on Monday, it does seem like she felt bad about what happened, and everyone is entitled to have an off day once in a while. I know I have them every now and then. And she's human. The one thing that I can never forget is how wonderful she was during my miscarriage. P kept reminding me of that the last two days. She is very much like me in personality...she doesn't mince words, she doesn't fawn or coo or make a fuss, and she gets right down to business and tells it like it is. Which is not a bad thing at just so happens that one of the things that she was blunt about happens to be the most sensitive touchy spot in my universe!

So we'll see what happens. I'm going to think about it for another week or so before I make up my mind. I don't have to decide anything. In fact, I can go see this other doctor and see if she rubs me the right way before I make up my mind! The thing is, I need to make my decision now...because I doubt that any doctor will accept me as a new patient if I decide to switch in a few months.

That's all I've got for now. I'm trying very hard to let what she said go, but it's hard. As I sit here typing this, I'm dressed for the treadmill, even though I'm very tired from a long day of work and have a long day in the field tomorrow. Today for lunch I was craving a hamburger in the WORST way, but I made myself get a grilled chicken salad. As much as she apologized, the damage has been done. Now, instead of looking in the mirror and seeing a cute pregnant poochie, I see...

Well, you know. *frown*

Monday, April 18, 2005

Houston, I HEARD the heartbeat!

I had my first official appointment with my doctor and she listened for the heartbeat, not really expecting to hear it since I'm nine weeks and usually it's not audible until 10-11 weeks, and we heard it! She said that it's registering about 170 beats per minute. It was nice and loud...quite a moment. I wish P had been there to enjoy it, but duty calls...he was on the golf course.

My own blood pressure is still pretty good...120/80. My uterus is right where it should be and everything looks good. She also feels pretty confident that this crud that I have is not a cold since my snot is clear (is that overshare or what?) but is allergies, so she wrote me a prescription for Zyrtec and Nasonex. I feel like I'm drying up, sort of.

The only bad thing that happened was that I got a stern lecture about my weight gain.

According to my doctor's scale (which I feel like is unfair since they weighed me this time with my boots on and last time I had flops on), I have gained twelve pounds since my follow-up appointment in January after my miscarriage. Okay, yes, I gained 10 lbs with the first pregnancy. Yes, I gained about 7 lbs out of sheer depression from losing my first pregnancy. But according to MY SCALE, I've only gained five with this pregnancy. Scale, schmale, my doc told me that she'd be happy if I didn't gain another single solitary pound during my entire pregnancy.

Wtf!?!? I thought an average weight gain during every pregnancy was 25-30 lbs. So I asked her that, and her response was, "Yes, that's true for people that weren't significantly overweight before they got pregnant."

And then it hit me. Let me tell you, it SUCKS to be called fat by your DOCTOR.

So I went into the whole thing about how I was a weight lifter, have a massive amount of muscle, was registered at 20% body fat when I weighed 161, etcetera, and I could tell it just wasn't flying with her and that she just thought it was a bunch of excuses, and the tears started to roll. With all the stress over miscarrying, being sick, tired, and now getting used to a new boss, now I have to start worrying about my weight AGAIN?! I kind of was looking forward to not having to think about it for another six months or so, and now I've got to worry about it. Again. After I started to cry, she quickly reassured me that if I am doing all that I can to ensure that I am eating well, exercising with some sort of aerobic activity every day, and getting back to the gym at least 3 x a week, and I still put on some weight, we'll discuss it, but she wants me back in the gym so I can "get my weight under control", but I have strict instructions not to diet. How in the name of Zeus' thunderbolt am I supposed to accomplish that?

I did have a flash of switching doctors since I just think this is ridiculous, but I've switched doctors twice already. This doctor knows my history. The office and hospital is right around the corner. I really have no desire to switch again. And as she said and P pointed out, she's just trying to recommend what's best, even if it makes me totally insane in the process.

So now I am left to contemplate just how I am going to work out, eat well withOUT dieting, and be pregnant at the same time. THIS SUCKS. But I am SO very thankful that everything is good with the baby and that there is a heartbeat...that really made my day. My doctor feels that my chances of miscarrying at this point are very very tiny indeed...and they went ahead and scheduled all my monthly checkups through July. She wants to do the big ultrasound around 18 weeks, which is about mid-June. Only eight more weeks to wait.

And as sure as I was that I would find out what I was having, I'm now tossing around the idea of just being surprised...which would be fun too. One of my friends at work, J, agreed to host my baby shower for that's exciting. Things are starting to click into place.

Sunday, April 17, 2005

Look what the cat dragged in...

...and that's ME.

I am not feeling any better. I have now had this icky cold for going on five days now, and I woke up this morning feeling like something a truck ran over. Fortunately, my doctor gave me permission on Friday to take Tylenol Cold, which I am faithfully taking while I wait for this icky cold to run its course, but it sucks in the meantime. I'm either sniffling or coughing every five seconds. It's SO gross. And energy? What energy? I went and got my hair cut yesterday, and the guy that cuts my hair was like, "Man, you're unusually quiet today." Duh...I'm ready to fall asleep under your hands, dude!

Then I went home, tried unsuccessfully for about two hours to nap, and couldn't due to the Tylenol Day formula I had taken that morning. So I just laid on my bed and watched tv. That's productive.

I don't foresee today being much more productive as I am still feeling very much under the weather, but I'm sure I can at least get some laundry done and get the kitchen picked up. I plan on mostly just lying on the couch resting and stitching of course. Noah's Sub is still going great, and I'm not sick of it yet (knock on wood) but I think it's because I'm breaking it down into small sections, not staying in one place the whole time, and taking breaks to work on other things when I get sick of it.

I have my next doctor's appointment tomorrow...with my actual real doctor. Not the ultrasound tech, and not a nurse. This is the point I never got to last time. Last pregnancy, I miscarried four days before this appointment. So, I guess I'm a little unsure of what to expect, and I admit I am a little nervous. I know she's going to do a full exam and everything, probably lecture me on my weight gain (I've gained about seven to eight pounds, I think), and I hope and pray, listen for the heartbeat. I really really really want another ultrasound, but I have a feeling that if I want that, I'm going to have to pay for that out of pocket. But we'll see.

I have nothing much else to report, other than we decided to wait until August to get our fence replaced. I admit the reasons are purely selfish...we have two choices, the fence or the kitchen, and we both want the kitchen remodeled MUCH MUCH MORE. Plus, storm season in Texas is upon us, and if we wait until August, that'll take care of all the windstorms and hailstorms and thunderstorms. So at some point in the next two weeks, I'm going to measure off our kitchen and write up an estimate for everything that we want done to it, and then we'll start talking with contractors and getting their estimates. I have a pretty good idea of who I want to do's this contractor I work pretty closely with and who did our tub and French door replacement last year. He's great, does good work, and gives a fair price, so I think we'll probably talk with him first before consulting with Home Depot or Lowe's.

P and I booked tickets for New Hampshire yesterday...we're going to fly and spend a good part of a week with my dad and stepmother at their condo in the New Hampshire mountains in late May. It will be the closest thing that we have had to a vacation together truly away from home (Lake Palestine was too short) since our honeymoon, so we're both really looking forward to it. I looked at the website for the place where my dad's condo is, and it looks really beautiful, so this is going to be a great trip, plus I'll get to visit my dad and stepmother and see their home in New Hampshire which I've never seen before. But check this out...this is how crazy my husband is about our dogs. He actually seriously contemplated putting us on two different flights just in case one of them goes the dogs would still have one of us to take care of them. I'm serious. He actually had it all planned out and everything for him to fly twenty minutes behind me. I told him to stop it and put us on the same flight. One thing you must understand is that this is my husband's first time flying since 9-11, whereas I have flown several times (California, Florida, North Carolina), so he's a little nervous.

That's all I've got for today. Send me some good get-well vibes and I hope everyone has a fantastic weekend!

Friday, April 15, 2005

Having a cold when you are pregnant sucks!

I remember before I got pregnant saying to P, "Man, I will be a TOTAL mess if I ever get a cold when I'm pregnant." I'm one of those folks that totally survives on Nyquil and Dayquil (the liquid format) when I get a cold or anything resembling a cold.

After I walked out of my last fire on Tuesday, I promptly started to feel that annoying itch in the back of my throat which has now morphed into a sore throat, an annoying hacking cough, running nose, achy back, and an overall stuffy feeling. Blah.

I did my best to hang with Tylenol all week, but finally called my doctor this morning whining. They said I could take anything made by Tylenol, plain old Robitussin or plain old Sudafed. So I picked up some Day/Night Tylenol Cold. While it ain't Nyquil or Dayquil, I do feel slightly better, although it has killed any semblance of an appetite that I had. I was practically force-feeding myself tonight because I knew I needed to eat, but just really didn't want to.


Today was Queenie's last day, THANK GOD. She was really driving me up the wall. I'll spare the details, but I was really ready to choke her. She emailed me one last email tonight asking if I wanted to have lunch when she comes back into town. I guess that's her lame attempt at the olive branch. Whatever.

Not much going on here at the moment other than just resting, trying to drive away this cold that has invaded my body, and stitching. I'm still working on Noah's Sub, as you can see from the update, and it's going well, although not as fast as I had hoped. I'm really going to have to pick up some speed here if I want a prayer of being done by the end of June! Tomorrow I have an appointment to get my hair cut, tomorrow night I'm going to a stitching night out with Sharon, and Sunday I am hoping to inspire P to take down the weight set in the to-be nursery so we can maybe paint next weekend! *smile*

I am officially nine weeks pregnant as of today! I have three more weeks to go until I'm past the point of when I miscarried last time. In some ways, it feels like it's going quickly, and in others, it feels like it's going slowly. I have a doctor's appointment on Monday, so we'll see how that goes.

Have a good weekend!

Tuesday, April 12, 2005

I'm back from the dead....

I got so many emails over the past week asking if I was okay and if all was well since my blog was...well, nonexistent. To this day, I still have no idea what happened. I tried to view it myself and I got the same blank page that you all did. Five emails to Blogger went for the most part unanswered. I did get one snotty email telling me that all I needed to do was clear my cache and cookies, which I did with no effect.

Turns out all I needed to do was just republish the stupid thing. And voila, I'm back!

So! Here I am, and thank you to everyone who emailed me to check and make sure I was still breathing. I am still breathing, and everything is fine.

The last week has been horrifically busy. I got a major fire loss last week which should have gone to our large loss team, and then, before I could even get started on that fire, I got another major fire loss THIS week. Both fires started in bedrooms, both had major contents loss, and the loss locations are about thirty minutes apart, and both families are very nice, so I guess it beats a sharp poke in the eye with a stick. Now, if I could just get the stuff done. Tomorrow is going to be a massive paperwork day. I really have to buckle down and get serious. I plan on ignoring my phone for the majority of the day. The good thing though is that I got to take a slave, K, with me...she's a new hire, about 23 years old, and desperate for something to do to keep her busy while she waits to go to property school in May. That's where going to fires with me comes in handy. I've had her inventorying contents at both fires and writing the estimates. I love having a slave! And I only have three days left under Queenie before I start reporting to my new boss, K.

The Tulsa retreat was a lot of fun. I tackled my first needlepoint project (Spring Quilt), finished a basket (which is holding a pink rosary and a pearl rosary, one for my present seahorse and one for the angel I lost in December), put another ten hours on Noah's Submarine, which you can see at the right, and took first place in linen for Mermaid of the Pearls. Plus, I had a ton of fun with my friend T, got to sufficiently relax, and bask in all the "Oh, you're pregnant! When are you due?" cooing. It was fun. I enjoyed it. If I had just had a more comfortable chair and the room had been air conditioned, I would have been in heaven.

Not a whole lot to report from this week so far. I did finally get my new company car, a Dodge Magnum, and it is sheer bliss to drive. It is like they envisioned the perfect car for an insurance adjuster, built it, and then somehow convinced my company to lease a fleet of them for us to drive. It is so perfect. It rides smooth, it has tons of room in the car, the trunk has a undercompartment for my ladder, a compartment to hold my sunglasses, and best of all, there are THREE (count 'em, THREE!) outlets for me to plug stuff in the front for a cell phone charger, one in the middle console for my converter (it has two outlets, so I can plug in my laptop and printer) so I can sit in the backseat and work in peace without dodging the steering wheel, and one in the trunk for my rechargeable flashlight. It is a nice color, the air conditioning works great, and it is just a wonderful, beautiful ride. Yesterday, I made the dumb mistake of scheduling an appointment in Denison (just south of the Oklahoma line) back to back with an appointment in Crowley, which is south of Fort Worth. Yeah. I left my house at 11:30 am, arrived home at 7 pm, and my appointments together totaled one hour and fifteen minutes. You do the math. That is a LOT of windshield time. At least I got to be sufficiently acquainted with my new friend. I'm trying really hard to keep the thing clean. I even brought a sheet today to drape over the driver's seat so I wouldn't get soot and smoke ground into the upholstery and a pair of flip flops to wear so I wouldn't muck up the floor mats. And I'm even being careful to throw all my trash away. Oh, it's wonderful! And the color? Vanilla. I love that color description! Of course, until I get my new plates I have to remember exactly where I parked every time I go to the office since there are about thirty other Magnums that look exactly like mine, but that's okay! I'll deal with it. P loves it so much, he actually wants me to inquire about buying it after the lease is up in three years. I'm not totally opposed to that idea's a great family car, and if we buy it used, it's not really used because I'll be the only one that drove it and my company will have paid for all the maintenance. So we'll see. I have a long way to go before my lease is up.

The hot Mexican came this week and removed our tree. It is like it was never there, which is a great thing, and this morning the City came and hauled off the old tree. So, #1, dishwasher, #2, tree. We have two things marked off our must-do-to-house list. #3 is definitely the fence. We got another quote tonight from a second fence company, and P is outside right now with the hot Mexican negotiating the original fence estimate that he had given us, so we'll see. I think next on our list will be to get the nursery ready to paint. Right now, it is most definitely the Room of Crap.

The pregnancy is still going fine. I can't believe I'm almost nine weeks along. In some ways it feels like time is flying, and then in other ways, it feels like it's dragging. My nausea has been pretty much at a minimum the last few days. I had quite a bit Saturday night when I was in Tulsa, and of course, I'm still exhausted all the time, but overall, it's much better than I anticipated. The new symptom (other than my porn boobs which have turned into pain boobs) is just feeling very tight and thick all the time. I also started to notice I'm having acid reflux, which is oh, so pleasant. My weight seems to be staying pretty stable, although P told me tonight I'm definitely starting to look pregnant (he meant it as a compliment), and I'm guestimating I'll probably need to go get some maternity jeans at least in about a month. My fire jeans are pretty tight when I button them. I also noticed that I seem to be more emotional than usual. I watched Finding Neverland last night, and I was bawling. I never cry at movies! (much)

So, that's the current update from Moira's Little World. Glad to be back!

Sunday, April 03, 2005

I have no appetite!

For the last three days, I have had the worst morning sickness imaginable, and I have not been hungry at all. I'm making myself eat, because I know I need to, but everything tastes funny. I went out to get a salad last night with P, a chicken apple walnut salad, and I ended up eating the apples only because everything else in the salad tasted bad.

So. Incredibly. Frustrating. Urgggg.

Anyway, I'll spare you the details of my morning sickness the last 48 hours (read my fertility journal if you just have to know), but it has not been pretty. I can't wait until this is over with the first trimester. And the fatigue! I slept another ten hours last night, about eleven Friday night, and there's just no end in sight. I'm exhausted all the time! And every time I have a stomach cramp, I panic and think that it's another miscarriage starting! I wish that I could have an ultrasound done every day. I've been investigating buying a Doppler heartbeat monitor so I can listen to the baby whenever I want, but apparently there is a massive shortage. I visited about ten websites last night to see if I could order one and every single website is out of them. Again, so incredibly frustrating. I'm not generally a very patient person. At least now I'm on a waiting list.

On a great note, my Heels beat Michigan State last night to go to the NCAA Championship! I watched the entire game and cheered them on. Go HEELS! I am so proud of my school! The staticians said that Carolina has gone to the Final Four more times than any other school out there, even now more than DOOK! That just warms my heart. snobs! Ok, Tarheel diatribe over. And listening to the coach speak after the game during the news conference...oh, it was like going home. I LOVE Southern accents!

Today, the laundry saga continues. All I got done yesterday was sorting and a few loads of towels. There is still tons of it to wash on my bedroom floor. I was thinking that I might go out today to run some errands, but I plain and simple just don't want to. Just too tired. I've got a terrifically busy week ahead, and since it's a four-day work week for me, it's going to be just jammed full of stuff all week. Friday, I am taking the day off to drive to Tulsa with one of my friends, T, for a stitching retreat. I am way too tired to make a nametag or a creative pair of slippers, but I am taking two pieces to enter in the stitching competition....Mermaid of the Pearls and Tradewinds. Anyone care to guess which one will win, if either of them do? Personally, my money is on Mermaid of the Pearls, even though Tradewinds is a much more complicated piece and took almost twice as long. People seem to be impressed with sparkle and glitter. I also set up a page just for my contest winners over the little ego page. I think I need to start entering stuff in the State Fair! Erica's Competition Winners

Stitching is going great. So far, I have put in a full ten hours on Noah's Sub, and I feel like I am making significant progress, although I admit that I have a LOOOOOONG way to go. I'm being good though and making myself take breaks on it and work on other things so I don't get sick of it. Last night I spent all night on Waiting For Ships, which I like so much more now than I did the first ten hours. Isn't that weird how that happens? I start a project, I enjoy it for about the first hour because it's new, loathe it for the next ten or so because it's got nothing done on it, and then enjoy it immensely after that once it takes shape. Very odd. But I think Noah's Sub is going to be a lot of fun. I even created a page for it on my website to motivate me to stitch on it so I can add pictures to it. Take a look: Erica's Noah's Sub page. I'm trying to break my habit of referring to it as Noah's Submarine. I realized yesterday when I was getting the pictures together of the original art and the Stoney Creek version that they refer to it as "Noah's Sub". Considering I've been referring to it as Noah's Submarine for what, six years now, it's going to be a hard habit to break! Anyway, I'm still going to shoot for June to finish it so I can take it in to be framed. Then, I'm going to try to finish the Precious Moments Noah's Ark by September (which is going to be very hard since that piece is really boring) and then my baby afghan by the time I give birth. I don't think it's going to be hard to finish my baby afghan...I could probably have it done in about thirty hours or so if I wanted to. I just don't want to! At least, not right now. I'm sure in a few months, I'll feel like it.

I had an incident this week with Queenie that really made me upset. I know now what has happened...she has started her low low carb Atkins diet again, she's stressed out with moving to San Antonio, she got called for jury duty on her last week of work, and is just in general running out of hours in the day to do stuff in. I totally understand this. But on Tuesday, I called her because I really needed her on something, and she totally snapped at me, told me that she "didn't have time for me today", and that I would just have to deal with it on my own. And then didn't even apologize for the way she treated me. I am going to be the bigger person here and let it go...she's only going to be my manager for about two more weeks...but she is not getting that cross stitch from me now. I am highly picky about who I stitch things for, and I'm sorry, but I did not deserve that. I'm still going to plan her Happy Hour for her and I'll buy her a going-away gift, but I'm not spending hours on a gift for her now that I could be spending on Noah's Sub for my nursery. So, in case you were wondering, that's why the teacher gift is not on my list of what I'm currently stitching. I took it off Q snaps and threw it in my tiny project bag.

I guess that's all I have going on at the moment. My dogs are sulking because I have to walk them, and considering that I'm starting the day at a deficit with Spring Forward, I guess I better wrap this up and get going. I hope everyone enjoys what little is left of their weekend!

One last thing...shamelessly stolen from Sharon's blog...A-Z about me!

Accent: I've lived kind of all over the country, but I'm told oftentimes that I sound like I'm from the Midwest.
Bra size: 36B when I'm not pregnant, probably a 38C now
Chore I hate: grocery shopping, cleaning out the litter boxes (which I'm on a nine-month vacation from) and laundry
Dad's name: Dan
Essential make-up: lipgloss, pressed powder and mascara; with those three things, I can feel somewhat human
Favorite perfume: Obsession
Gold or Silver: White gold and silver
Hometown: Born in New York, ages 4-13 in Tempe, Arizona, ages 13-21 in North Carolina, and now reside in Dallas, Texas
Interesting fact: I am fairly good at speaking Spanish
Job title: Special Claims Representative
Kids: One on the way!
Living arrangements: ranch house, three bedrooms, two bathrooms
Mom's Birthplace: somewhere in New York
Number of apples eaten in last week: 3-5, can't remember exactly
Overnight hospital stays: umbilical hernia at the age of seven and removal of a oral cyst at the age of five
Phobia: sharks, bugs and confined spaces
Question you ask yourself a lot: Am I ready to be a mother?
Religious affiliation: Catholic
Siblings: one younger sister
Time I wake up: 8-8:30 am on work days, 11-12 on weekends
Unnatural hair color: my natural hair color is dark blonde, I prefer light blonde, so I color it
Vegetable I refuse to eat: Brussel sprouts
Worst habit: I am a chronic nail biter; I have to make a conscious effort not to do it
X-rays: lots of teeth x-rays, three ultrasounds (is that really an x-ray?), and one CAT scan
Yummy food I make: spinach artichoke dip, Rocky Road bars, cheesecake, brownies and chicken marsala
Zodiac sign: Taurus

Okay, now I'm really done!