Closure

Closure is a good thing, I've realized.

Very late last night, the miscarriage completed. There was no mistaking it. I didn't want to gross anyone out, so I posted the details here in my fertility diary. Read at your own risk! I called my doctor's office to fill them in, and they confirmed it too based on my description and said that they were very glad I did it on my own.

I am very relieved though for the closure. I went to bed last night with a clear head, and woke up with a sense of closure. Sadness, but closure. It was tough to tell people at work today, and I know it's not over yet. Tomorrow morning I have to go to my claims office, and it's going to be very tough to face people and fight back tears. But I'm strong! I can do it.

This is what P bought me as a "please stop crying" bribe yesterday:



I still really want that black hearts barrel satchel that I mentioned a few months back, but apparently Dooney and Bourke is discontinuing the bubble gum pink, periwinkle, raspberry and grape colors of their IT line, and all their IT bags in those colors were 30% off yesterday at Dillard's. That's the only reason I gave in! And pink was my second choice when I bought my first Dooney...

Anyway, I'm doing okay. Not great, not bad, just okay. I only cried once today and it was because of work. I had some cramping, but it was mild, and my doctor said I can start back on ibuprofen tomorrow.

I do think though that I'm going to boycott my company's Christmas party. I don't really want to go, and neither does P, so we're thinking about just spending that night at home or going out for a quiet dinner together.

Thanks again for all the thoughts and prayers!